8 Things Older Generations Did That Gen Z Considers ‘Trauma’
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Generational differences in parenting practices have always sparked conversation, but today there’s a growing trend in which Gen Z is reexamining how older generations raised children. What was once considered standard or even beneficial parenting has now been classified as emotionally harmful or traumatic by the younger generation.
This shift is rooted in a broader understanding of mental health, emotional safety, and the importance of boundaries. Here are various practices from older generations that Gen Z identifies as emotionally detrimental.
The Clean Plate Club
The phrase “There are starving children in the world; you should be grateful for your food” was a common refrain at many children’s dinner tables in the past. Parents often forced their children to finish everything on their plate, disregarding hunger cues and the concept of bodily autonomy.
For Gen Z, this practice represents a violation of personal choice. Forcing a child to override their own satiety signals can lead to unhealthy relationships with food later in life, potentially resulting in disordered eating habits. Research indicates that children who experience restrictive feeding practices are at a higher risk for developing obesity, eating disorders, and food obsession in adulthood. The emotional weight of “cleaning your plate” distorts food from nourishment into a power struggle, affecting the child’s ability to trust their body’s natural signals.
The “Almond Mom” Phenomenon
The 1990s and 2000s were marked by an intense societal focus on body image, particularly among women. The rise of diet culture often saw mothers projecting their insecurities about weight and appearance onto their daughters, framing thinness as the ultimate measure of self-worth.
This phenomenon, often referred to as the “Almond Mom” culture, involves mothers offering restrictive eating advice, such as suggesting a single almond to stave off hunger. Gen Z has recognized this as deeply problematic, as it perpetuates toxic beauty standards and damages a child’s relationship with food. It shifts the focus from nourishment to judgment, contributing to body image issues and eating disorders.
The Sibling Comparison Game
One of the most prevalent tactics in older generations’ parenting was constant sibling comparisons. Phrases like “Why can’t you be more like your brother?” were common in many households, creating an environment where competition between siblings overshadowed cooperation and love.
Gen Z identifies this behavior as emotionally manipulative, resulting in children growing up with a deep-seated fear of inadequacy. It fosters the belief that love and affection are contingent on accomplishments, undermining self-worth and creating long-lasting effects on mental health. The fixation on sibling comparisons often turns family dynamics into a toxic hierarchy, pitting one child against another. This approach can undermine healthy sibling relationships and foster feelings of resentment or rivalry that persist into adulthood.
Corporal Punishment
Corporal punishment, particularly spanking with implements such as belts or wooden spoons, was once widely accepted as a form of discipline. Parents often justified this physical punishment by believing it would lead to better behavior and respect. However, modern psychology shows that physical discipline can cause long-term emotional harm.
Gen Z views corporal punishment not as discipline, but as a form of physical assault that teaches children that violence is an acceptable method of resolving conflict. The practice leaves lasting scars on a child’s emotional well-being, fostering feelings of fear rather than respect. With the rise of gentle parenting, there’s a shift toward non-violent forms of discipline that encourage communication and mutual respect.
Forced Affection
In many families, children were expected to show affection to relatives, regardless of their personal comfort. “Go give Uncle Bob a kiss” was often a command, with little regard for the child’s emotional state or personal boundaries.
Gen Z recognizes that this practice taught children they did not have control over their own bodies and that their comfort was secondary to adult expectations. By being conditioned to meet the emotional needs of adults, children learned to suppress their own desires for physical autonomy. This practice has lasting consequences, as it can create vulnerability to manipulation and abuse later in life.
Secondhand Smoke Exposure
Before the dangers of secondhand smoke were widely known, it was common for parents to smoke in cars, homes, and other spaces where their children were present. Children were often subjected to this toxic environment without a choice, breathing in harmful chemicals on a daily basis.
The CDC reports that exposure to secondhand smoke can result in severe respiratory issues, asthma attacks, and an increased risk of heart disease in children. Gen Z identifies this practice as a form of neglect, as parents prioritized their own habits over their child’s health and well-being. This exposure not only affected their physical health but also shaped their understanding of personal responsibility and self-care.
Ignoring Mental Health Struggles
For many children raised in previous generations, mental health struggles were not recognized or addressed. If a child expressed anxiety or sadness, they were often told to “stop crying” or “you have nothing to be sad about.” This invalidation of emotional distress taught children to suppress their feelings, as seeking help was often seen as a sign of weakness.
Gen Z has led the charge in breaking the stigma around mental health, advocating for the importance of therapy and emotional expression. By ignoring a child’s emotional pain, previous generations inadvertently exacerbated the very struggles they failed to acknowledge. Gen Z’s recognition of this emotional neglect emphasizes the importance of validation and open communication about mental health.
The Lack of Privacy
Privacy was often viewed as an unnecessary luxury by many parents in older generations. Diaries were read, doors were removed from hinges, and phone calls were monitored. This lack of respect for personal space created an atmosphere where children felt constantly watched and scrutinized.
For Gen Z, the idea that privacy must be earned or can be easily violated is one they reject. Privacy is seen as an essential part of self-respect and individual autonomy. Without it, children grow up with a heightened sense of secrecy and fear of judgment, which can stunt emotional development and self-expression.
