6 Outdated Manners That Younger Generations Find Cringe-Worthy
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Manners are designed to create a sense of respect, connection, and comfort. Yet, in a rapidly evolving social landscape, what was once a sign of proper etiquette now often feels outdated, awkward, or even condescending.
While old-school politeness may have worked well for previous generations, younger people today question many of these customs. From rigid rules about how to greet someone to expectations around phone use and conversation dynamics, the manners that once seemed essential now often come off as cringeworthy.
Below are six outdated manners that make younger generations cringe, and why it’s time to leave them behind.
Unsolicited Advice as a Show of Wisdom
Offering unsolicited advice might have been seen as an act of wisdom or kindness in the past. But today, it often comes across as condescending or judgmental. When someone offers advice without being asked, especially when it’s not relevant or wanted, it can feel like a critique rather than helpful guidance.
Younger generations are more likely to value independence and the opportunity to make their own decisions. Rather than unsolicited advice, they prefer conversations that involve listening, offering suggestions only when asked, and engaging in a more collaborative, supportive manner.
This shift toward empowerment and mutual respect makes interactions feel more balanced and authentic.
Insisting on Formal Titles Over First Names
The rigid use of formal titles, “Mr.,” “Mrs.,” “Ms.”, “Dr.” to address someone, especially older adults or authority figures, may have once been a sign of respect, but it now comes across as stiff and hierarchical. Younger generations value equality and approachability. Using first names, even in professional settings, fosters a sense of camaraderie and breaks down unnecessary barriers.
In today’s world, addressing someone by their first name doesn’t diminish respect; it creates a space for open, collaborative communication. Clinging to formal titles in informal settings can alienate others and make interactions feel cold and impersonal. Let’s level the playing field and bring a bit of ease into our conversations.
Criticizing Phone Use at the Table
A few decades ago, using your phone at the dinner table was considered incredibly rude. However, in the modern world, phones have become tools for communication, organization, and even for enhancing social interactions. Whether it’s checking in with a loved one, pulling up a recipe, or showing a funny meme, phones are part of the conversation now.
Forcing a strict no-phone rule at the table can seem outdated, especially when phones can actually facilitate conversation. It’s essential to strike a balance. If someone is spending too much time scrolling through social media instead of engaging, that’s one thing—but using a phone to contribute to the moment should not be criticized so harshly.
Expecting Handwritten Thank-You Notes for Simple Acts of Kindness
In the past, handwritten thank-you notes were a hallmark of good manners, especially after receiving gifts or favors. Today, however, they can feel overly formal and out of touch with the fast-paced, digital world we live in. Sending a quick thank-you text or email is not only more efficient but also feels more sincere in the context of small gestures.
A delayed envelope for a small favor, like holding the door open or passing along a link, often feels performative, as if you’re trying too hard to prove gratitude. Younger people appreciate genuine, immediate acknowledgment over old-fashioned rituals that don’t match the moment.
Automatically Expecting Younger People to Defer to Elders
Respect for elders used to mean automatically deferring to their opinions, staying silent while they spoke, and agreeing without question. This model, though rooted in good intentions, feels patronizing to younger generations, who often prefer mutual respect and dialogue over hierarchical communication.
Younger people value their own autonomy and prefer environments where ideas and perspectives are shared equally, regardless of age. Whether in family discussions or professional settings, equality and fairness are prioritized over simply deferring to age-based authority.
This shift in perspective fosters more dynamic, thoughtful conversations and promotes real connection.
Commenting on Someone’s Appearance as a Greeting
In previous generations, commenting on someone’s appearance was a common way to greet them. A compliment on an outfit, hairstyle, or weight was seen as a friendly way to show interest. But for younger generations, these comments can feel intrusive, superficial, and sometimes downright uncomfortable.
A remark about someone’s appearance, whether positive or negative, focuses on the external rather than the personal. It can create a sense of objectification or make someone feel self-conscious, especially in a casual setting where the focus should be on the conversation, not what someone looks like.
Younger people prefer to be greeted with genuine interest in their experiences, thoughts, or feelings rather than their appearance.
Conclusion
While these manners may have been the backbone of good social conduct in the past, they no longer resonate with today’s more casual, inclusive, and egalitarian mindset. Younger generations value authenticity, mutual respect, and fluidity in social interactions.
Moving away from these outdated customs allows us to foster stronger, more meaningful connections. It’s time to let go of these cringeworthy habits and embrace a new wave of politeness that works for everyone.
