This article was originally published on Crafting Your Home. A human contributor also wrote and edited the post.
Brian Austin Green just handed us a masterclass in “growth era” energy, and it is giving therapy-arc glow-up.
The Beverly Hills, 90210 alum sat down for a candid chat about his nearly fifteen years with ex-wife Megan Fox, and he did not hold back on the one habit he says sabotaged his love life for years.
Spoiler alert: it involves a lot of leading with the eyes before the heart ever gets a say.
During his July 12 appearance on the I Do, Part 2 podcast, Green got refreshingly real about what actually powered his relationship with Fox from the jump.
“My ex and I were together for almost 15 years,” Green began. “We were married for almost 10 years and I led with physical attraction.” He did not stop there either, breaking down exactly how that pattern played out every single time.
“First, I’d be physically attracted to somebody and then sort of build a relationship around that,” he explained, basically confirming that chemistry was always step one and everything else got figured out later. Relatable? Maybe a little too relatable for some of us.
The Attraction Trap That Kept Repeating Itself
Here is where things get interesting… Green did not just admit to the pattern; he actually unpacked why it never worked in the long term. According to the actor, building a relationship on looks alone is basically setting a timer on the whole thing.
“Your approach to a relationship is the best way to know if it’s just a purely physical connection,” he said. “That’s only going to last for so long that you’re going to get to a point where you go, ‘I can’t stand that other person. So they’re not hot to me anymore.’” Ouch, but also, kind of iconic honesty right there.
Green and Fox first crossed paths in 2004 while filming Hope & Faith, and their chemistry clearly did not fizzle out quickly, as they went on to marry in 2010.
Together they share three sons, Noah, born in 2012, Bodhi, born in 2014, and Journey, born in 2016, and the family built a life that played out very publicly for over a decade.
But by 2020, the marriage had run its course, and the split sent Green into a period of genuine self-reflection about what he actually wanted from love going forward.
That reflection did not just stay in his head, either; it turned into actual work. Green has spoken before about how becoming a newly single father of three pushed him to confront patterns that were not serving him, and this podcast appearance reinforced that same message.
He made clear that repeating the same relationship blueprint was simply not an option once he understood how much it had cost him emotionally over the years.
Why Friendship First Became His New Golden Rule
This is the part where Green basically rewrites his own relationship rulebook, and it is honestly a pretty wholesome pivot. Instead of leading with attraction, he now swears by starting with a genuine friendship and letting everything else follow naturally.
“I think when you started from a place of a genuine connection with someone, then you’re not so concerned about whether they are truly into you or not,” he explained, adding that this approach lets two people communicate “in a very transparent way.”
According to Green, transparency is the whole point because it strips away the guessing games that come with a purely physical spark.
When you already know someone as a person before things turn romantic, there is less anxiety about whether the attraction is mutual or whether the connection is even real.
He credits this shift in mindset for completely changing how he approaches dating and commitment today, six years removed from his divorce.
And it clearly worked out, because this is exactly the blueprint he followed with his now fiancée, Dancing With the Stars pro Sharna Burgess. The two built a real friendship long before anything romantic developed, spending time together and getting comfortable before ever crossing that line.
Green said that “getting to know someone first helps create honesty, trust, and better communication,” and by all accounts, that foundation has held up beautifully in the years since.
Sharna Burgess, Zane, and a Whole Lot of Honesty
Green and Burgess did not just build a friendship first; they also made brutal honesty a non-negotiable from day one. Before things got serious, the pair sat down and talked through their best and worst qualities, no sugarcoating involved.
“Sharna and I talked about our best qualities and our worst qualities together,” the Knots Landing alum said. “We sort of put it all out on the table.”
That kind of radical honesty early on is exactly what Green believes sets a relationship up to actually last, rather than one built on chemistry alone that eventually fizzles.
The couple went Instagram official in January 2021 and later competed together on season 30 of Dancing with the Stars, where things got even more serious after their elimination.
They welcomed their son, Zane, in 2022 and got engaged the following year, and today their blended family includes quite a few kids under one very busy roof.
Green also has an adult son, Kassius, from his relationship with ex Vanessa Marcil, rounding out a household that requires some serious coordination.
As for how everything connects with Fox’s side of the family, things appear to be running smoothly there too. Fox shares daughter Saga Blade, born in March 2025, with former fiancé Machine Gun Kelly, whose real name is Colson Baker.
Sharna previously opened up about how well Zane has taken to his baby sister, gushing that “that’s his baby sister. They’re deeply in love. She is the absolute cutest thing, and it’s really beautiful.” It is the kind of blended family update that makes you go aww, honestly.
Green’s story is basically proof that heartbreak, as painful as it is, can actually lead somewhere good if you are willing to do the uncomfortable work afterward.
He did not just walk away from his marriage with regrets; he walked away with an entirely new understanding of what he needed in a partner. And judging by how settled and honest his relationship with Burgess sounds today, that lesson clearly stuck.
At the end of the day, Green’s message is a pretty simple one dressed up in celebrity gossip clothing. Attraction might get you through the door, but friendship and honesty are what keep you in the room.
Something tells us a lot of people will be screenshotting that quote about not being “hot” anymore for their group chats by tonight.
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